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Why It’s Important to Remain Emotionally Detached From Your Results

By: Brian Kim - December 16, 2008

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It’s a classic stumbling block most people face especially at the beginning of their journey. They’re enthusiastic, pumped up, gung ho, put some plans into action to achieve their goals – and they fall flat on their face when it comes to the results that ensue.

What happens after this is crucial.

Most people carry over their emotions and attach them to the initial results of their journey and as we all know, those initial results aren’t pretty. The outcome is – “Oh woe is me, I’m an utter failure, a total loser”, etc., and they then go on a downward spiral that’s hard to climb out of, afraid to take action out of fear of what the results will be if they try again.

It’s easy to go down this path when you’re emotionally attached to your results because let’s face it, the results aren’t going to be that great initially and the emotions that come out of that are predominately fear and worry.

The first thing to realize is this:

It can’t be right the first time.

It just can’t.

It’s LUDICROUS to think that you can get it right form the get go. NOBODY EVER DOES.

But it’s ok. It’s expected to be like that the first time.

And even if it does look like someone got it the first time, dig deeper into the past and you’ll see that it wasn’t perfect before at all the first time and that they corrected it along the way.

The second thing in regards to that is to step back and look at the big picture. What you’ll find when you look back on any journey you’ve taken to achieve a goal is that the journey looks like a long plateau where nothing gets done but you suddenly find yourself at the end of the plateau, able to climb to the next level. As you go along and make progress, the plateaus get shorter and shorter as you develop momentum and you go on to higher and higher levels faster and faster.

If you’re too zeroed in on the results in front of you, it’s easy to miss this big picture and stop at the beginning of the first long plateau.

Realize that it’s all simply a part of the process.

Three, realize that the more unattached you are, the more “mechanical” your actions become and the more mechanical they are, the more objective you can become with regard to analyzing the results of those actions.

If your actions are mechanical, it’s easy to DO things. It’s EASY to take action and look for feedback, and then correct accordingly and then take MORE action.

If you’re emotionally attached, you fear to take action because you think – “What if it doesn’t work again like when I tried it the first time or it’s not perfect enough for me to implement yet”, etc. You hesitate to take action and you get stuck in the phantom zone where nothing ever gets done.

DETACH yourself, make your actions mechanical, be objective and act like a scientist – become CURIOUS as to what the results will be.

Imagine if Edison was emotionally attached to the results of trying to invent the light bulb. He never would’ve made it by the third try.

10,000 tries can only be done if you have a mechanical and objective outlook on the results that ensue when you put your plans into action.

Fear and worry tend to manifest if you’re emotionally tied to the results, especially in the beginning because the results aren’t going to be pretty.

But realize that it’s ok that things don’t turn out good in the beginning.

Realize that’s how it’s supposed to be.

Then, see things in the big picture. Remember the plateau analogy. Don’t just quit on the first long plateau.

Become like a scientist. Have fun! Experiment. See what works and what doesn’t.

And just build on what does.

Emotions are great when used to drive you forward along the journey.

Not so great when you mix them up with the results of your efforts.

Detach your emotions from your results. Be mechanical. Analyze the results for feedback and correction. And take action once again.

And you’ll find those plateaus getting shorter and shorter and the results you want coming faster and faster.

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3 Responses to “Why It’s Important to Remain Emotionally Detached From Your Results”

  1. Bloompocket Says:

    Thank you so much for driving this point home! With all of the motivational/productivity information, it’s so easy to forget that this ’stuff’ we’re all trying so hard to achieve and get is just…stuff, and the world of “stuff” can never make me truly joyous and at peace. When I see that there’s so much more to life than having everything turn out precisely how I want it to turn out, and just on my schedule, then I can begin to detach and *allow* for things to come my way, enjoying myself the whole time because I’m just having fun and not thinking ahead to some dooomsday scenario of failure. If I can detach and find peace on the inside, then all of the outer stuff will take care of itself in the best manner possible.

  2. Brian Kim Says:

    Very nicely said Bloompocket!

  3. Prasanna S Says:

    Absolutely, we should not succumb to emotions either in sport or life, if a marathon runner goes through his/her emotions, the goal can’t be achieved, our mindset should be mechanical like a car which runs for 100k miles over years or a plane which flies for more than a decade, the longer the distance we reach, the better the results will be.

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