This is a tough situation most people have trouble dealing with.

And it comes to them in different situations.

In one type of situation, the entire rug is pulled from beneath them. Their world is turned upside down. They don’t know what to do, times are tough and they don’t know exactly how it’s all going to work out.

Then for others, it comes when they finally muster the courage to follow their dreams. But they don’t know exactly how it’s all going to work out.

In both cases – it’s the fear of the unknown that “paralyzes” them so to speak.

That pitch black darkness that envelops the “how to” part that holds the information to get where they want to be is right in front of them and because it’s unknown, it strikes fear and despair in their hearts.

It’s a scary place to be and it’s easy to mentally operate out of fear and negativity when you are in it so how do we deal with it?

It’s simple.

SEE IT AS A FUN DISCOVERY PROCESS.

You have to reframe it here.

It any pursuit, in ANY endeavor, there is ALWAYS a process to it. ALWAYS.

You just don’t know it yet.

And the great thing is you don’t HAVE to know it ALL in the beginning.

You just need to know the first couple of steps.

You don’t need to learn what step 6 is until you’ve completed steps 1-5.

And you probably will only know what steps 1-3 are in the beginning.

So how will you know what steps 4-5 are?

Simple.

You’ll know after you complete steps 1, 2, and 3.

You see, most people know what they have to do, but they don’t do it because they want to see what the other steps will be first. Maybe steps 6-8 will contain a more efficient way to get to where you want to be, but you won’t know what those will be until you do steps 1-5.

Relieve yourself of the burden of knowing the ENTIRE process.

What fun would that be?

It’s like watching a movie.

If you know EXACTLY how it’s going to play out, scene by scene, all the dialogue, cinematography, action sequences, lighting, etc., - compare that with not having a single clue as to what the movie is about, not seeing any previews whatsoever, not hearing any reviews from friends and family that might influence how we perceive the movie, and just sitting back and watching it with an open mind. The former is boring, but the latter is exciting. It’s a fun discovery process.

I’m sure we’ve all had that experience when we saw a movie with a purely open mind – and were blown away by how good it was. Usually movies that flew under the radar (Gattaca was that experience for me).

Again, relieve yourself of the burden of knowing the ENTIRE process.

You don’t have to know it all in the beginning.

It’s a fun discovery process.

This is an important paradigm to follow because it helps with another case – the case of shooting too high.

We all want to get to step 100, but we need to get to step 5 first and to get to step 5 we need to do steps 1-4 but if we only know steps 1-3 in the beginning, we need to do them so step 4 will reveal itself.

And it will.

Most people want step 99 so they can get to step 100. They want step 99 so bad but they don’t take any actions to get to step 5.

You’re a lot closer to step 99 from step 5 than you are from step 0.

The steps you need to take will reveal themselves so long as you keep taking them.

They will reveal themselves in the results of the steps you take, ideas you have, talks with other people, books you’ve read that, things you hear or read about in the news, etc.

STAY PRESENT.

It’s easy to lose yourself in the pitch black darkness if you keep on looking way ahead instead of looking at what’s in front of you.

Also, it helps to take a lot of steps in the beginning – a whole slew. Really cast your net wide, and see what you “catch” as a result. Then your next steps can be based on the areas that show the best results. Your next steps can stem from the actions that resulted in those great results

Another important thing is to not forget the fuel. What’s the fuel? Your desire. Your why.

Since it IS a discovery process, it will take time and you will need the fuel to drive through it. That’s why they say if you have a strong enough why, you’ll eventually find the how.

I strongly believe that.

The why is more important than the how.

WHY are you doing this?

Also realize this about your discovery process.

It’s NOT a straight line.

It’s made up of twists and turns SO NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU LOOK, YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO PROJECT WHAT’S AROUND THE CORNER UNTIL YOU GO AROUND THE CORNER.

So much time is wasted in the mental world where you try to figure out how things will be like several steps ahead or what they might entail – you can guess all you want but chances are you will have NO idea until you actually take the steps to get to that point and turn the corner to see what’s there.

So don’t fall into the fearful mindset when you don’t know exactly how things will work out for you.

It IS a discovery process.

A process you can choose to see as a fun one.

And you CAN choose. Always remember.

Stay present. Do the steps that are clear for you to do that are right in front of you. The rest will reveal itself in time.

You just have to continually follow the steps that come up right in front of you.

And it’s only when you look back, that you’ll be able to know EXACTLY how it all worked out for you.

  
     

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